this kid makes me want to cry


In life, there are two kinds of people: "Kid People" and "Adult People". Some just seem to be born with a chromosome that makes them understand and want to be around children all the time while others don't. I don't.

I have never been a kid person. 

The reason why we only have one kid is because we both don't want to go through the nightmare again of having a baby in the house. It's loud, messy, tiring and nerve-wracking. A baby's cry has a way of resonating itself into the center of my brain resulting in stress bombs that explode and spread all over my cranium to create an instant migraine that leaves a constant throbbing in my temple all day.

But don't get me wrong, I'm not entirely anti-baby. Our daughter was the best thing that happened to us. There were many difficult days but the good days exponentially surpassed that all... 
The first time I saw her smile, the first time she gripped my finger, her first diaper change, the funny faces she would make when she's pooping, how she would run around the house with her arm extended so she wouldn't bump into corners (a little trick she developed herself after numerous accidents with the kitchen counter :P), she was (and still is) such an adorable little baby filled with character that I can't help but smile as I write and relive those memories.

Despite all that, at the back of my head, I can still hear those high-pitched screams that never fail to rattle me....

Wait, that wasn't my imagination, it's here, now and coming from the kitchen!

Yes. since two weeks ago, I have been forced to endure the constant wailing and destruction of a toddler approaching his terrible twos and it's not even mine (insert crying emoticon here).

Here's the prelogue:

About a month ago, our maid discovered that her husband was cheating on her with their neighbor. She went home, confronted the bitch, got into a wild fight (complete with death threats and policemen, the whole shebang), called it quits and came back here seething. She was done and wanted nothing to do with him.

The dilemma was that both of their kids were staying with him and her in-laws. As if this wasn't enough to get her reeling, they would also call twice a week requesting for money to buy milk, diapers and whatnots. In other words, they were squeezing her dry.

I'm all for girl power and shit but when she asked me for permission to allow her little boy to live with us, I wanted to say no, but how could I?

I'm not a cold-hearted bitch but those living arrangements come with an excess baggage of drama.

It's not just the screaming (and believe me this boy doesn't stop, day in, day out all I hear is waaaaah!), it's all the other little things: what if he breaks something, gets into an accident, etc, etc. I don't want to sound selfish but I already have my own fair share of headaches and don't want to add to it.

But like I said, what could I do? I had no choice and now he's here and I am at my wits end!

I work and write mostly from home and it has become almost impossible to accomplish anything with all the crying happening around here. I'm telling you, it's like one minute you're on a roll with all these ideas in your head that you can't type fast enough and then your concentration is broken by a high-pitched squeal and suddenly all those ideas go down the drain replaced by a constant throbbing in your temple that is preventing you from digging down to retrieve them.

It's annoying. What's also annoying is that this kid is spoiled. He refuses to be disciplined and his mom either a) let's it slide or b) can't control him.

Case in point: I caught him playing with the power button of our dvd player yesterday. He kept switching it on and off. I called his attention and told him to stop and that it wasn't a toy. What did he do? He just stood there staring me in the eye with his little finger on the power button. It felt like he was challenging me! He wouldn't budge even when I stood up to approach him. He just stood right there mad-dogging me back. I had to move him away from the player just so he'd stop. And what did he do after that? You guessed it, screamed and cried his lungs out. I have never spanked a child in my entire life but this little bugger tests my patience everyday.

I told his mom about this and she said the reason behind his insolence is because his (stupid) father refused to have anyone discipline him. 

I don't know about you but in my opinion, that is a recipe for disaster. How can you not discipline a child? That is like letting your dog do whatever he wants. Chew your favorite shoe into shreds? No problem. That is unacceptable especially when it's happening under my roof.

Aside from that, her work ethic has been suffering too since a huge chunk of her time is now devoted to taking care of her kid.

Seems like the obvious answer here is to take matters into my own hands but reality is a bit more complicated than that especially considering how terribly onion-skinned our culture is. I can already picture the teleserye-ish drama unfolding: "kinakawawa po kami dun, blah blah blah". Please. 
No thank you. Shit. What do I do?

Add this pile of dung into a wild, emotional rollercoaster ride brought on by a private family matter, stress from numerous work deadlines, piling bills, money matters and what do you have? An even bigger pile of shit.

Excuse me for all the manure references but that is exactly what it feels like :/

Have a nice day everyone, meanwhile, allow me to plug in my earphones and play the loudest music I can find to drown everything out. insert Pantera here.



Comments

butch said…
The most obvious solution... Can you afford to let this maid go? Or, could she ask her mom or some other relatives to take care of him nalang? Sometimes, it's good to be a good Samaritan but there are times when it's not worth your own sanity. I went through a similar situation (di ko na ikwekwento kasi medyo mahaba, but quite similar to yours), I was torn between being generous and compassionate or having my precious mental health be wrecked on a daily basis. In the end I let the maid go. Best decision ever, in hindsight. I ended up doing the housework myself but the freedom from emotional burdens far outweighed the physical stress. Good luck =)
ava te-zabat said…
Omg momma sar… you're too nice. I myself know the feeling of a crying toddler since Asher is still small and I try my best to discipline him since I can cos he's mine. I have a friend though who's exactly like that (let's it slide or can't control her kid) and it really gets to me. :| I don't understand parents like that either.


I hope things get better!!!
Chel Pablo said…
hi! I have the Topshop Niece model, 100% leather, like yours. Are they a pain to clean? How is the maintenance. Haven't worn mine yet.
sarahtirona said…
hi ava! thanks for the sympathy, sayang i wanted to chat longer with you yesterday pero wala nang time :( see you soon!!!
sarahtirona said…
hi butch! been contemplating that a lot but i cant survive without a maid right now and its so difficult to find a good replacement :( i'll see how this pans out first. I just dont like the way its making me feel like a bad person sometimes because i get irritated but then its my home and i like it peaceful and quiet, you know what i mean? i didnt sign up for this. its just so frustrating.... :((
sarahtirona said…
I just wipe it with a damp rag afterwards and then dry it, fairly easy to maintain :)
Juvy Coros said…
I love this entry! Helped me so much on building up my blog. Thank you! :)))
Piathought said…
Really very informative! I just love your blog so much! ♥
sarahtirona said…
thank you piathought, appreciate it :)
sarahtirona said…
you're welcome, glad you like it :)
sarahtirona said…
you're welcome :)
sarahtirona said…
thank you :) xoxo